The official blog of the Second City World in What If Sports Hardball Dynasty.
Friday, February 29, 2008
The Nashville Harmonies, firmly planted in 3rd place in the NL South, have won 31 or 55 games at home in Nashville. However, the road has not been nearly as friendly to the Harmonies, as they've won just 20 of 56 road contests. What could possibly explain it?
Harmonie President Tom Drennan had this to say, "In a word, it's Elvis. There's a reason we're the only team in the league that wears Blue Suade Shoes. When we're on the road, we're stuck wearing grey, which the King would never have approved of. We train in Memphis, just 2 blocks from Graceland. Our players meditate there prior to every home game and we take a team bus from Memphis to Nashville. We just can't find the same kind of connection on the road, even at the Heartbreak Hotel."
Harmonie players echoed Drennan's sentiments. Relief pitcher Keith Webster was born in Prinsburg, MN but he's been an Elvis lover since birth. "My mom actually named me Elvis, but my dad said 'Don't Be Cruel', so Elvis is only my middle name. Playing in Nashville is a dream come true, and the ladies here really love the lamb chops. I just don't get that kind of respect on the road."
Long time Harmonie reliever Douglas Clark is another huge Elvis fan. "I've made over ten million dollars in Nashville. I'd trade it all to have the voice of the king. Instead, I'll have to settle for his looks." Clark wouldn't comment on a reported restraining order filed by Priscilla Presley.
The season continues for the Harmonies and they're not likely to turn it around on the road until they play in Las Vegas. Unfortunately for the Harmonies, they're not scheduled to 'Viva Las Vegas' until next season.