Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Threester Forgos Defense

Austin Drillers owner threester may have gotten himself in too deep. Threester amassed a fortune playing high limit poker at the Bellagio and renowned skin flint, Larry Flynt's Hustler Casino. Threester took down many a pro, including Phil Ivy, Johnny Chen and the annoying Chris Moneymaker. With these vast resources, threester came up with a sound business plan. He decided to invest in some baseball teams. Threester thrived on the poor economy as many teams were going under. His strategy was to buy teams on the cheap in the ever expanding What If foreclosure market.

But he may have gone too far. Threester has acquired nineteen franchises! Novice owners have a tough time getting away with two franchises. Many of us know that the hardest part of running a franchise is naming the team, but threester got around this dilemna but naming most of his teams the Pilots. However, all this acquistion has caused problems in his brain. One need only look to the saga of Al Escobar for evidence of this fact. Despite having a below average range and glove for a first basemen, threester has started poor Al in centerfield 18 times this season! When hes not playing CF, Al has been tossed in the ring at 3b. Things have gotten so bad that the slowest man in baseball, San Juan's Rudy Leiter, often bunts for hits against Austin. As seen in the accompanying picture, Al is celebrating after a game where he actually caught a fly ball.

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